Since the beginning of lockdown, one thing that struck me is : I need to be productive more than ever before. Why? Because I had nothing ‘special’ to do. Doing something ‘special’ , will help me to increase my ‘worth’ not only before my mates but also will add increament to my ‘value’. At the end of the day, I will get my reward , that is , success. This objectivity of aspiring to be productive and hence it ‘s concomitant sucess may have resonated with few or may be more. And there’s nothing wrong in that. We all want to be successful and for that we all have been inculcated with the same idea: Work hard, party hard.
After, visualising for few seconds of partying hard, we get into this business of being productive. But how far we are successful?
My personal experience:
So accordingly , I watched several self-help videos which had flooded the online platforms , created To-Do lists to get my things done on time. These do’ s , I thought , were making me ‘worthy’ enough and a ‘better’ person. But unfortunately, not. All these went in vain . I was drowned by excess self – doubt , depressed, even when my To-Do assignments were on the verge of completion. But still the dream of making myself valuable was dragging me towards the sea of uncertainty , through which I don’t want to sail. But my work which was of high priority was getting completed and still I wasn’t happy. Again ,Why ?
Although the realisation was late , but understandable.
So, What did I do then?
I stopped watching self-help videos. Though I am not against any of them.But those sudden kick of motivation is just a temporary fixation, not for long – run.
Next , I did was:
Pushed a Pause button. According to one of the articles of Bradford Health Services, It is important to create margin in your day to think and reflect on the deeper “Whys” of your life and reasons for choosing sobriety. (read here:https://bradfordhealth.com/the-power-of-a-mental-pause/#).
So, now I have to figure out my Why or Whys. First of all : why I want to be productive more than ever? Was I not productive enough ? Or I didn’t do anything special before? Or was I not worthy enough or valuable as well ? Or I only want to be productive to boast about it before my mates? This is a new trend anyways
Hence , it is clear that it was not only for reward: of becoming a successful person and partying hard at the end of the day. Jill Duffy , one of the author of Get Organised: How to clean up your Messy Digital Life , in one of her blog post at productivityreport.org ,stated that ,When people read productivity tips, what they want is forgiveness.
This insecurity stemming from my low confidence had always backed me. To school, to colleges. I always yearned for a sense of validation, which I believed that being productive might smoothen its rough edges. I will be busy all the time, faking and hence trapping myself within a box which I don’t want to be in …I wanted and want and will want my freedom always.
My freedom lies in…
Reading,writing,making crafts, self- photography, everything that comes under the vast canopy of being me . So then , it was simple, I readjusted my routine and included these activities in between my daily chores.And Voila !!!! I started my Blog, which I so eagerly wanted. I again started doing those crafts which brought back my childhood. Those selfies on which my wide smile appears with yellowish tinged teeth. Yes ! I did it again…
Conclusion : What I have actually learnt?
Hey, if you have made into the last line I know what you will all think about; may be again I will recite some philosophical thoughts and say aloud with an attached photo,which shows some random people letting their hands up which says: “To do what you love”. No.
..Do which will help you to Live ..
In this growing competitive world, we know we have to be productive enough to reach our target. But in the midst of those hustle bustle we tend to forget ourselves. I had forgotten myself. I know I was and am good in crafts but I had pushed aside all these to reach a targeted place where I will have all the papers before me but those are so important that I could hardly make a aeroplane out of it.
I don’t want to live there. Hence, inculcating not the 7 habits , but the habits that will help me making my aeroplane of dreams , is my goal.
…..and …Things from which you don’t expect any outcome since the moment you start to do that, brings you the utmost satisfaction which your ultimate target may not bring to you….
Because : Productivity doesn’t guarantee success , satisfaction does.
Which are the things that make you both happy and productive? Leave a comment below. I’d love to know.